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Nov. 20, 2024

Lessons from Digital Marketing Career Missteps

Lessons from Digital Marketing Career Missteps

Today, we're breaking new ground with not one, but three incredible guests - Taryn Stoddard, Kali Ashford, and Sara Malo.

All trailblazers in their own right, they share their unique experiences and insights from navigating the challenging waters of male-dominated industries.

This episode explores the spectrum of their professional journeys.

We'll touch on the importance of boundaries, the evolving dynamics of gender roles in the workplace, and how collective support has helped these women carve out spaces of their own.

Plus, we'll discuss innovative initiatives like LinkUnite, a community that aims to elevate female representation in the performance marketing industry.

Join host Jim Banks as he reflects on his own career challenges, while engaging with our guests about the lessons they've learned from their past, the technical hurdles they’ve overcome, and their visions for a more inclusive future.

Whether you're curious about the nuances of urban networking, keen on understanding the balance between chivalry and modern professional conduct, or looking for inspiration on supporting young talent, this episode is packed with valuable takeaways.

So, let’s get into it.

 

I have one small favour to ask, would you please visit this link and follow the show on whichever platform you prefer to listen to podcasts on.

If you prefer video podcasts then subscribe to the podcast over on YouTube and subscribe to receive notifications for future episodes. 

Important Notes

This is Digital Marketing Stories on Bad Decisions with Jim Banks, the weekly podcast for digital marketers who want to learn from the best.

New episodes are released every Wednesday at 2PM GMT where you'll get digital marketing stories and anecdotes along with bad decisions and success stories from digital marketing guests who've been there and done that in many of the disciplines that make up the discipline of digital marketing.

The podcast has been been powered by Captivate and all the ums, and ers have been removed using Descript to make your listening more enjoyable.

Some of the snappy titles, introductions, transcripts were created using AI Magic via Castmagic

Disclaimer: some of the links on the show notes of my podcast are affiliate links.

If you click and buy from any of these links, I may receive a commission as a result of your action.

Transcript

Speaker:

Okay, so recording. We are live. I say

 

 


Speaker:

we're live, not live. We're live in the

 

 


Speaker:

kind of the recording. So welcome to this particular episode

 

 


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of Bad Decisions with Jim Banks. I have got a first today.

 

 


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I've got more than one guest on today, so I

 

 


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have no idea how this episode is going to go down. It could

 

 


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go amazingly well, in which case I'll do more of them moving forward. It could

 

 


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be the worst experience I've ever had in my life, but we'll just kind of

 

 


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give it a go and see what we end up with. But I had the

 

 


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opportunity a few weeks ago now to attend

 

 


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an affiliate event in London called Afiverse, which was a new event.

 

 


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We'll talk about that on the show. But

 

 


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I had the opportunity to have a couple of drinks at the afterparty with

 

 


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the three ladies that are on this show now. And I put the idea to

 

 


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them about, why don't we record a podcast episode? It's called Bad

 

 


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Decisions with Jim Banks. They all were sort of with me, so they were all

 

 


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making bad decisions. So I just thought it'd be a really, really good episode to

 

 


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kind of pull the three of them on. And I'm delighted to have Sara,

 

 


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Taryn, and Cali as my guests today. So who wants to say

 

 


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hello for posterity?

 

 


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Come on, somebody. Oh, we're. Oh,

 

 


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Little. Thank you, Jim, for having us sign. It was a pleasure to see

 

 


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all three of you at Elevate in London, and I'm just

 

 


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so happy to be here. I think this is going to be fun. Oh, that's

 

 


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it. It was called Elevate, wasn't it? Not my bad. Elevate. Yeah,

 

 


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well, it's Affiverse supported it and lead gen 1, so

 

 


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it's cool. Sarah helped keep that on, so she should know the name.

 

 


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You know, I just go up to things.

 

 


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So. So, Karen, tell us kind of where you are. And

 

 


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hello, by the way. Hi. Hi.

 

 


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I'm Taryn Stodder, the owner of the Kaiju Group Agency.

 

 


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I'm located in St. Augustine, Florida.

 

 


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It looks like it's sunny there. It is

 

 


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perfect weather today. What's it outside right now? Oh, it's 77

 

 


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degrees and very little humidity. Absolutely gorgeous.

 

 


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I cannot complain. Perhaps you. Hate you. I'm going to kick you off

 

 


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this podcast episode right now.

 

 


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I mean, we have another hurricane coming, if that makes anybody feel better. You

 

 


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know, it's the positive and negatives of Florida.

 

 


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I think there is another one that's going to hit south Florida sometime soon. This

 

 


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is really late in the season to do so though. And

 

 


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Cali. I'm Kaylee Ashford.

 

 


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I am the owner and founder of Ad Media

 

 


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Cards where we manage payments for companies that buy

 

 


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ads on Google and Facebook. I've worked in the

 

 


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payment industry for about 20 years now and been managing

 

 


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Ad Media Cards for the last almost nine years.

 

 


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Today I'm in Mocta at a conference and it's

 

 


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warm ish weather. So.

 

 


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Moved, haven't you. Didn't you move? Yes. So I

 

 


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recently just moved to West Palm Beach. Is that to be

 

 


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new Donald Trump

 

 


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or should we just. Oh no, no election plaque. I just,

 

 


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I don't that those are the only two options that we

 

 


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had. That. That's my take on it.

 

 


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Yeah. Other than that I got out. I left. I left

 

 


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Florida on the 5th on election day and went to Canada.

 

 


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That's how I'm going to politics. There we go.

 

 


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Yeah, I'm not planning. I'm just talking at all about

 

 


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politics on this particular episode because I just find

 

 


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the whole thing so depressing really. But anyway, that's by the by.

 

 


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So I butchered your name. Right. And are you

 

 


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Sarah or Sarah? Because I never know

 

 


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I was Sarah. Yeah, my name should be pretty

 

 


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the. Yeah, it should be. And I didn't really say what I

 

 


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do, but I laughed because. Because

 

 


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Kaylee and we've been calling her Callie for however many

 

 


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years. My gosh is at Sigma and fun

 

 


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fact, during COVID I actually worked for them for a short

 

 


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time and put on another affiliate event. I don't know if you guys remember

 

 


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ags, but so I'd basically been involved in every

 

 


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event in the industry for the most part. Yeah, we do know

 

 


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that. Knows everything that's

 

 


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going on. So yeah. So obviously that's, that's who's on the show

 

 


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today again. I'm super, super excited to have

 

 


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everyone on today. I guess maybe to kind

 

 


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of sort of kick us off. I mean you all know each other

 

 


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through the industry, right? But I think that the kind of

 

 


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the, the thing that kind of binds you all together is Link Unite. Right.

 

 


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So Sarah, you're one of the co founders of Link Unite and

 

 


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perhaps you can kind of just talk to us a little bit about that and

 

 


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kind of what the motivation for setting it up was. Right. Because I've been

 

 


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in the industry a long time. We've all been in the industry a long time.

 

 


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Right. I've never, I've never really thought about the kind of

 

 


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the disparity between male and female

 

 


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people in the industry. Right. To me it's always been a, an industry

 

 


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where I've, I've surrounded myself with people

 

 


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and I've never really considered the, the kind of, the color of their skin or

 

 


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the gender that they are. Right. But as a sort of white man is

 

 


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probably easy for me to kind of make that, that sort of

 

 


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assumption. Right. Talk. To talk me a little bit about.

 

 


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I put the shovel down. Yeah. I mean, it's, it's, it's funny you say that,

 

 


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because when all three of us ladies started, there was very, very few

 

 


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women in this industry. And that's sort of how Link UNITE

 

 


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began because we wanted to have some sort of support

 

 


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for women, draw more women into this industry

 

 


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and lift them up, you know, get more women on stages,

 

 


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you know, support women starting their own businesses. And so that's really where

 

 


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Link UNITE came from. We were actually, I'm located in Massachusetts, and we were

 

 


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at Leeds Con in Boston, and we just started

 

 


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making notes on a napkin. Of all the women that, you

 

 


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know, we knew that Amanda Ferris and myself knew,

 

 


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you know, who do you know, who did you meet? You know, is this, is

 

 


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this woman, you know, she, could she be part of our group, this kind of

 

 


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thing. And we didn't want, we didn't want to,

 

 


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we wanted everybody essentially. You know, we started to where

 

 


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we were drawing in director, leveling up women. And then we realized,

 

 


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like, we want everybody to be part of Link unite. And

 

 


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we have so many male partners and people like you, Jim, that support

 

 


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us. And so it's growing rapidly. We have

 

 


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a membership, we're doing a mentorship. We just. I had a call this morning with

 

 


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a new event MAU that they're coming to us looking

 

 


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for speakers for their event. And that's what we're here for. We just

 

 


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want to elevate all the women in the industry and anybody that wants to

 

 


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be part of this group. So we're lucky to have people like Taryn and

 

 


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Krie a part of this. Yeah. Because I, I think I,

 

 


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I, I probably make the mistake of I called it an

 

 


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initiative and I don't really, I mean, it's, it's. So when you filled in your

 

 


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bio, right. And your bios will obviously be on the kind of the

 

 


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site when we finish the episode, like you call it a community

 

 


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of executive leaders. Right.

 

 


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Which again, I think, I think for me it's,

 

 


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I think that there has been women in the industry, but I think women

 

 


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in senior positions has been a little bit more challenging. And I just

 

 


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wondered if you could explain because obviously Taryn and Katie you

 

 


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both run your own businesses now, but you have worked with other

 

 


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people previously, I presume. Yeah, so.

 

 


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So perhaps maybe you can kind of tell me a little bit about kind of

 

 


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the challenges of kind of coming into the industry. I mean, what. What did you

 

 


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do before the industry sort of existed for you, and how did you get

 

 


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into it? Oh, gosh. I

 

 


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mean, myself, I was an affiliate manager. And

 

 


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so that was when affiliate marketing first was born. And my gosh,

 

 


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I don't even want to say the year that that was, because then we're going

 

 


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to be aging all of ourselves here. And I, you know, I just really

 

 


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loved affiliate marketing. I was like, I knew nothing about this. You know, when I

 

 


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was in college, I was taking business courses and I just was. I

 

 


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had to learn more. I had to know more about search engine optimization, the

 

 


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whole nine yards. And then I met

 

 


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Missy Ward and Sean Collins. And so, you know, I

 

 


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went to work for Affiliate Summit, part of that original team to grow that

 

 


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event. But, you know, women just didn't have the same

 

 


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opportunities in this industry. A few, you know, I would

 

 


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say back 10 years ago, I don't know if that's fair

 

 


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enough to say that time range or so, but, you know, there

 

 


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was very few men that were in CEO roles,

 

 


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COO roles. And so, you know, Link Unite was going

 

 


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to just help elevate that, give women

 

 


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those opportunities and, you know, just the courage to

 

 


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step up and start their own businesses. You know, when

 

 


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we started having calls about Link Unite and getting on the phone with these women,

 

 


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we realized so many people needed so much support

 

 


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that we didn't even realize how much support they needed. And so

 

 


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it was. It's just been quite the ride and I love every minute

 

 


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of it.

 

 


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So, Taryn, what's the support do you get from

 

 


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Lead? What kind of support do I get? Oh,

 

 


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gosh, so much, you know, anything from

 

 


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new client support, prospecting to just

 

 


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management support, you know, of how to handle different folks.

 

 


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I work with suggestions on just how to run my business

 

 


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successfully, what to look out for, what to prepare for. You know, as

 

 


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a single business owner, I. That has been. And just

 

 


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in general, you know, the support and having confidence that

 

 


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people think, you know, I can do this, I can run a business. You know,

 

 


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it's. People are like, why aren't you doing this? You know, that kind of thing.

 

 


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And then I just one day, basically, a friend of mine in the

 

 


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industry, Sylvia Lee, she, she's like,

 

 


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go get your LLC and I'll give you your first deal. Like, that kind of

 

 


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thing. She's like, let's do this, girl. You got this. I've known you for 20

 

 


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years. Like, come on now. And so that's how

 

 


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that happened. You know, it's just sometimes we do doubt ourselves. I

 

 


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don't know that I would say I had this kind of ideal of

 

 


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like imposter syndrome or anything like that because I, you know, I'm a self

 

 


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confident individual. But it's just that do I want to put all my eggs in

 

 


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one basket and just bet on myself? And you know what?

 

 


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When I started talking to folks about it, especially the ladies of Link unite, they're

 

 


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like, oh, hell yeah, girl, come on now. Like it was, that was the

 

 


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general consensus. And that support alone, you know, has allowed me

 

 


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to create the Kaiju Group, which has been wonderful.

 

 


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So I'm, I'm super excited about it and I, and I'm always happy to help

 

 


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anybody in our organization as well.

 

 


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You know, Jim, I just want to add another point too about the personal

 

 


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support that we're also bringing to each other.

 

 


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I mean, Taryn and Kaley are moms just

 

 


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like me. And we're working, we're juggling

 

 


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jobs, we're doing all these things plus raising children and just

 

 


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be able to text each other and get ideas. Just

 

 


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that alone has been huge for me personally.

 

 


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Taryn affects you a lot. It's like we're raising

 

 


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teenagers and it's tough.

 

 


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So it's nice to be able to have other like minded women to bounce

 

 


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ideas off of. Kaylee, how did you.

 

 


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Yes, I mean I've been in this industry

 

 


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probably almost as many years as Sarah. So,

 

 


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you know, again, don't want to age us. But yeah, I

 

 


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remember in the industry there weren't very many. Like I entered

 

 


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the industry not as a C level executive, just in

 

 


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an account management type role and going to the

 

 


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shows and there weren't very many women and the women that were

 

 


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in the industry, they weren't helping each other, they weren't in support of

 

 


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each other. They weren't, they weren't anxious for other

 

 


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women to succeed and do well because if it meant they

 

 


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were doing well, then you're not doing well. And

 

 


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it was very much a competition and I hated that

 

 


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so much. I'm not a competitive person.

 

 


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I love to see other people around me grow and do

 

 


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well because the more they do well, the more I grow and do

 

 


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well because it elevates them and then it elevates me as

 

 


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well. You surround the people, you surround

 

 


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yourself with people that are interested in Doing

 

 


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well and doing more and being better and

 

 


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you'll get there. And that's really what Link UNITE

 

 


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provided. That's really where they

 

 


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were like minded women that wanted to see

 

 


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other women in the industry succeed. And Duval, and that's the

 

 


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mentorship program comes in and it's so fantastic

 

 


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to just being someone who's been in the industry to

 

 


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tell someone new in the industry, it's like, it's okay. I, I've been there.

 

 


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I get it. I know as women we know it's hard to be

 

 


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taken seriously whether we're 20 years old or

 

 


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40 years old. We're not taken any seriously at 40 than we

 

 


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were at 20. And for men at 20 years old, it's a little

 

 


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bit difficult to be taken seriously, but at 40 years old, there's

 

 


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no problem. Yeah, it's funny kind of correlation to

 

 


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how happy you are doing your job. Right. So I was miserable, absolutely

 

 


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miserable. So I had the opportunity to kind of leave that and get involved in.

 

 


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I put digital marketing inverted commas because I did. I don't really

 

 


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think the industry existed at the time. There was certainly no YouTube.

 

 


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There was no communities for any description.

 

 


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Right. I mean, my most recent podcast episode was a guy called Brett

 

 


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Tabke who was the founder of pubcon. Right. And I mean we talk about sort

 

 


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of the origins of Pubcon back in sort of 2000, 2001. And

 

 


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you know, and again, it was just a. I mean, we use the term

 

 


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guys. I mean it was a bunch of guys meeting in the publisher, but it

 

 


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was a bunch of guys. I think there was probably two women that

 

 


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came along and the other 48 were men. Right. And I

 

 


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think it's evolved, but it's still probably nowhere near where

 

 


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it ought to be considering that, you know, women

 

 


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are the kind of the dominant in terms of

 

 


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numbers, gender in the world. Right. So I

 

 


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think for me it's, you know, there's definitely work that still needs to be done

 

 


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to try and do that, elevating the kind of the presence

 

 


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of, you know, women. Because unlike a lot of other

 

 


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industries, ours is not an industry where how strong you are

 

 


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physically matters at all. I mean, I know Taryn, you probably like bench

 

 


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press more than probably all of us. Right. But, but I think.

 

 


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Oh, you're funny, Dar it it. But to add to that, you know,

 

 


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and this is the thing, I. I am very fortunate and I

 

 


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know that. I mean, I got my start when I used to live in California.

 

 


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I got my start at I Village E Commerce division in San

 

 


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Diego. Now the Main office was in New York, but San

 

 


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Diego handled all the e commerce of ivillage.

 

 


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And I wanted to succeed in my

 

 


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career and I moved back to San

 

 


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Francisco. And I was so fortunate to have some

 

 


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guys at agencies when I got specifically involved in affiliate marketing, who

 

 


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were my advocates, who did educate me, who did, in a

 

 


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word, protect me, because there were a lot of bad dudes out there. And if

 

 


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I made it known, like, hey, look at. Listen to how this guy's talking to

 

 


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me. Or, you know, presenting himself and they're like, beat that

 

 


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guy. You know, they. They really were like, you don't have to put up with

 

 


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that. We don't put up with. We're not going to put up with that. We're

 

 


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not going to let you put up with that. So I've been very fortunate to

 

 


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have an awesome group of men and advocates in this industry, you

 

 


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know, of the male persuasion. So. Which allowed me to build my

 

 


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confidence to help other women in our industry, too. Because

 

 


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unfortunately, the women in our industry, we do talk and we do

 

 


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know who the good guys and the bad guys are. You know, it all comes

 

 


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down to references, you know, and a lot of the time, you know, there's different

 

 


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groups, whether it's on Facebook or on, you know, in different chats that we have.

 

 


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We're like, hey, do you know this guy? Or do you. Have you heard this

 

 


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about this company or that? And we do give good and bad reviews,

 

 


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you know, fair reviews. Not, you know, not, you know,

 

 


Speaker:

what's the word I'm looking for? You know, just like, trying to get back at

 

 


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anybody, but like, just like, okay, yeah, no, that person has, you know, they're

 

 


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legitimate, they pay on time, et cetera, because nobody wants to waste their

 

 


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time. But like I said, we utilize each other as a

 

 


Speaker:

resource regularly when it comes to business. But you guys, you know,

 

 


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it's funny because I have some clients who pitch offers to me, and

 

 


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as an agency and network, you know, I will broker out offers. They. They're

 

 


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like, hey, can you. Can you ask the lad if they'll run this? Will they.

 

 


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Do the ladies like this offer?

 

 


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And they're like, oh, if we can get in with that group, you know, we'll

 

 


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have tons of traffic. So it is, you know, it's definitely a force to

 

 


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be reckoned with. But like I said, I

 

 


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appreciate all the help I've gotten in this industry, you know.

 

 


Speaker:

Yeah. So I always recall. So when I first started my very,

 

 


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very first agency, So I had three jobs in 18 months. I

 

 


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got laid off months, right? And I.

 

 


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At the end of the third one, I thought to myself, fuck this. I

 

 


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don't want to kind of do this again. I don't want to kind of get.

 

 


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Keep getting laid off by other people who don't really have my interests

 

 


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at heart, right? So I figured I backed myself. I said, I'll just set up

 

 


Speaker:

my own business. So I did. I set up my own business. I kind of

 

 


Speaker:

moved into an office. I hired a guy who, again, he was

 

 


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probably the. The worst digital

 

 


Speaker:

market I've ever worked with in my life. But he was

 

 


Speaker:

honest, reliable, and trustworthy. And on that basis, it was like

 

 


Speaker:

he was the best guy I ever had working with me, right? Because, you know,

 

 


Speaker:

there's a lot of skills you can kind of instill in people, right? And

 

 


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integrity, trust, honesty. They're not. They're the sort of things that

 

 


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people either have that baked in or they don't, right? And I don't think your

 

 


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gender matters. Your color, like, none of that matters, right? You

 

 


Speaker:

either are a trustworthy person, honest person, right?

 

 


Speaker:

Reliable. And people can say, yeah, I want to do

 

 


Speaker:

some business with that person, or you don't, right? So what was really

 

 


Speaker:

interesting is, again, I think back then, there wasn't

 

 


Speaker:

the kind of the resource pool that was available.

 

 


Speaker:

I think as an industry, we were tiny, right? So there was

 

 


Speaker:

no track record to say, well, this is the sort of person you want to

 

 


Speaker:

try and attract to kind of come in, right? So for me, it was almost

 

 


Speaker:

like a God. I need to kind of employ people. So one of the first

 

 


Speaker:

people I employed was my stepdaughter. And, you

 

 


Speaker:

know, she's a sort of very, very pretty blonde

 

 


Speaker:

girl. And I had another girl in the office, and, you know,

 

 


Speaker:

we hired these two girls, and I'm doing some training, and I'm sort of sitting

 

 


Speaker:

down and I'm doing some keyword research. And, you know, there

 

 


Speaker:

was a tool called Word, I think it was called Word Tracker, and they had

 

 


Speaker:

a tool, listed the top 100 keywords that

 

 


Speaker:

existed, right? And obviously, you know, on those would be things like sex

 

 


Speaker:

and stuff like that. But one of the words that was on there was milf,

 

 


Speaker:

right? I had no idea what the word was. So I'm trying.

 

 


Speaker:

I'm doing this. And what you do is you type this in,

 

 


Speaker:

typed it into a search engine, and all of a sudden, oh, my

 

 


Speaker:

God, right? I

 

 


Speaker:

discovered. And. And I think in that respect, it's like, you have to

 

 


Speaker:

be respectful of the situation.

 

 


Speaker:

So again, I've sold virtually everything you can Think of Under

 

 


Speaker:

the sun, right? So I've sold loads of sex toys, Viagra, stuff like that.

 

 


Speaker:

But the problem you have is that if you have people who are coming into

 

 


Speaker:

your business, you have to respect their religious beliefs and all that,

 

 


Speaker:

sort of. So you can't just go, look, we work on porn, so you just

 

 


Speaker:

need to kind of go and do this stuff. Because that's what we do. Right?

 

 


Speaker:

Because if people are uncomfortable with it, then that's not really

 

 


Speaker:

helpful. Have you ever had any sort of situations where you've been asked to do

 

 


Speaker:

something in the industry where you're going, I'm not comfortable doing

 

 


Speaker:

that? I mean, I've got.

 

 


Speaker:

Yes. Oh, yeah. I was like, where we start? Who's starting?

 

 


Speaker:

I think that it's important to

 

 


Speaker:

understand boundaries and understand what your boundaries

 

 


Speaker:

are and be open to listening to what other

 

 


Speaker:

people's boundaries are. I think that especially

 

 


Speaker:

for younger women, especially, it's harder

 

 


Speaker:

to know what's okay to have is set

 

 


Speaker:

boundaries. For people new in the industry, men

 

 


Speaker:

and women, it's hard for them to know what those boundaries should be.

 

 


Speaker:

Working the extra hours without getting paid, working

 

 


Speaker:

on content that you don't agree with, whether

 

 


Speaker:

it's political or adult or

 

 


Speaker:

gaming or whatever that industry may be.

 

 


Speaker:

B2B. Have to have the checkbox. Are

 

 


Speaker:

you okay with Mel? I've had the

 

 


Speaker:

opportunity for. My stepdaughter has been in industry ever since then. That was

 

 


Speaker:

probably like 2002 or 3. So she's been in the industry a long

 

 


Speaker:

time. Right. And I think because of that, I've had a

 

 


Speaker:

good sounding board of trying to understand the challenges that some

 

 


Speaker:

women face in terms of the industry. Right. Because it's not

 

 


Speaker:

always been sort of plain sailing. Right. And, you know, and

 

 


Speaker:

now she's obviously. She's married herself, she's got two small

 

 


Speaker:

children, so I'm kind of doing granddad duties, so. So I'm kind of

 

 


Speaker:

taking on some of the responsibilities to enable her to kind of carry on working.

 

 


Speaker:

I'm. I've got a bit more free time, so. Because I'm probably a little bit

 

 


Speaker:

older and kind of grayer, so, you know, I will sometimes pick

 

 


Speaker:

the kids, grandkids up from school and stuff like that and bring them home and

 

 


Speaker:

feed them and what have you. Right. Because I have the flexibility of running

 

 


Speaker:

my business to be able to kind of do that. Right. And kind of choose

 

 


Speaker:

what to do, when to do it, how to do it, who I want to

 

 


Speaker:

work with, who I don't want to work with. Right. So.

 

 


Speaker:

Well, I was going to add also to some of this. I think one of

 

 


Speaker:

the most uncomfortable conversations, I'll say one for me and then one for

 

 


Speaker:

a guy who used to work for me. So one of the things I remember

 

 


Speaker:

being back in San Francisco, I was told one time they're like, well, just use

 

 


Speaker:

your, your feminine ways to make it happen. And I'm like, so

 

 


Speaker:

I sat there with my smart assery and I'm like. What are my feminine ways

 

 


Speaker:

exactly? I'd like to know, you know, and it was, it was almost expected

 

 


Speaker:

of me at certain agencies to be flirty, to be

 

 


Speaker:

super sweet and taught this way to get what I needed. And I'm

 

 


Speaker:

like, first and foremost, if you know me, I'm like, I do

 

 


Speaker:

not talk like that. I'm a nice person very much. I'm all for compliments,

 

 


Speaker:

but mama is sassy. You know, that's just how it is.

 

 


Speaker:

And you know, I quite, I quite like it. And most people around me

 

 


Speaker:

do too. So no, I wasn't going to sit here and be

 

 


Speaker:

fake about who I was and how I was. And I was told I should

 

 


Speaker:

wear a dress more often. So I would soften the blow.

 

 


Speaker:

I'm like, the fuck? Like, it's just

 

 


Speaker:

like, oh, why? I mean, because, yes, this is, I mean I'm a very

 

 


Speaker:

casual individual. But yeah, I do like to get decked out every so often.

 

 


Speaker:

As some of y'all have seen, I can clean up nicely and when I feel

 

 


Speaker:

like it, I don't want to be told what to do. What's that?

 

 


Speaker:

You do scrub up well. Ah, thank you, thank you.

 

 


Speaker:

I do try sometimes, but you know, I, that was just, it was so

 

 


Speaker:

frustrating for me to just be face to face with that and have it be

 

 


Speaker:

blatantly told. Now the other side of thing is because, you know, we

 

 


Speaker:

are talking about women in this industry, but sometimes the poor guys.

 

 


Speaker:

I had a kid, I shouldn't say kid. He was a young man in his

 

 


Speaker:

20s, come work for me when I was out in San Francisco and

 

 


Speaker:

he interviewed for the media buying

 

 


Speaker:

team at one of the agencies I was working at. And

 

 


Speaker:

he was coming from Friend Finder. And as most of us

 

 


Speaker:

know, Friend finder was about

 

 


Speaker:

5% friend finding and 95%

 

 


Speaker:

adult friend finding. And so he was managing most of their

 

 


Speaker:

ad placement and whatnot. Is he goes. And the first day he came

 

 


Speaker:

in, I think it was the first day, let's just say it was. He goes,

 

 


Speaker:

taryn, thank you so much for hiring me. He goes, I got really tired of

 

 


Speaker:

Staring at naked people all day long. And I could never show my work to

 

 


Speaker:

my parents. It was so embarrassing.

 

 


Speaker:

Like, you're welcome.

 

 


Speaker:

You get tired of boobs all day long. I told you that one

 

 


Speaker:

of the jobs that I got laid off 83 times in 18 months. One,

 

 


Speaker:

the, one of the jobs that I had was working for this,

 

 


Speaker:

it was a telecoms company and they did basically premium rate dialers,

 

 


Speaker:

right? So there was two industries that that was really big, big on. One

 

 


Speaker:

was gambling, right? So they had like tips to lines where people could phone up

 

 


Speaker:

and get tips for the horse racing and stuff like that. And the one other

 

 


Speaker:

one was porn, right? So again, we were dealing

 

 


Speaker:

with like bonafide porn barons. And I used to kind of like

 

 


Speaker:

go and visit like people on site. So I used to go to warehouses where

 

 


Speaker:

you'd have sort of like the fetish room where people would be sort of

 

 


Speaker:

there with chains and width. And I always figured that, you know, if

 

 


Speaker:

you were sort of in this, the room that the, the

 

 


Speaker:

women that would be in the room or the men that would be in them,

 

 


Speaker:

because it wasn't just for women. It was like whoever was in the room would

 

 


Speaker:

be just dressed in normal sort of civilian clothes, but they were all dressed up

 

 


Speaker:

in the sort of the gear that they would expect to be on, right?

 

 


Speaker:

But what was really interesting, I kind of turned up for this job, right?

 

 


Speaker:

So, so the guy who was my, my boss, he sort of said, oh,

 

 


Speaker:

this is, this is Ivan. There's the toilets over there. This. We can go and

 

 


Speaker:

get yourself a drink. Ivan's going to show you some porn, right? And I basically

 

 


Speaker:

sort of, for, for probably the first couple of days, all

 

 


Speaker:

I did was just spend all this time looking at porn sites. And you

 

 


Speaker:

know, I think eventually you become immune to what it is, right? Becomes.

 

 


Speaker:

You just dial it out. It becomes. But I think, you know, had that been

 

 


Speaker:

a sort of a woman in that position, I think that would have been the

 

 


Speaker:

most uncomfortable sort of introduction kind of going really?

 

 


Speaker:

But. So, yeah, so,

 

 


Speaker:

but, but I think, I think when I, when I had the. I had an

 

 


Speaker:

affiliate network and one of the challenges was always like, you

 

 


Speaker:

know, your best affiliates, you would want to

 

 


Speaker:

try and sort of entertain them in the best way that

 

 


Speaker:

they wanted to be entertained, right? So, you know, it would always be, you turn

 

 


Speaker:

up to Las Vegas for Affiliate Summit, it'd be like, hey, we're going to go

 

 


Speaker:

out. We can do a club, we can get a table in the club, we

 

 


Speaker:

can go for a nice meal, right? And Then

 

 


Speaker:

we go. Or we can go to a strip club. And because the majority of

 

 


Speaker:

my affiliates were all young men, it was like, let's go to a strip

 

 


Speaker:

club. I would find myself. And again, like my sort of

 

 


Speaker:

stepdaughter, we'd find ourselves in the strip club. And it's uncomfortable to

 

 


Speaker:

be there. And again, I didn't really want to be there. I just would

 

 


Speaker:

much rather not be there at all. Right. And any of you know me now

 

 


Speaker:

in Terry, you know me all too well. I'm the mayor of the Chandelier Bar

 

 


Speaker:

at the Cosmopolitan Hotel, and I never leave that bar. Right. I

 

 


Speaker:

mean, I've kind of like, I'm just there, and people say, where will you

 

 


Speaker:

be? I'll be in the Chandelier Bar. Right? Because I just don't want to go

 

 


Speaker:

to strip clubs. I don't want to do clubs. I've done them all. I've done,

 

 


Speaker:

you know, I've done them to death. Yeah. So.

 

 


Speaker:

And I think in some respects, that was a.

 

 


Speaker:

You know, I know that that was part of the affiliate manager's role, was to

 

 


Speaker:

kind of put yourself into that position. I just wondered how you felt. Did you

 

 


Speaker:

ever get asked to kind of do that? Was that something that you kind of

 

 


Speaker:

got asked to do and how did you feel about it?

 

 


Speaker:

I think we probably all have. I mean, we definitely. And it

 

 


Speaker:

was acceptable, Jim, what, 15, 20 years

 

 


Speaker:

ago to do that, but now it's not.

 

 


Speaker:

You don't have to. You know, we all felt, back in the day we had

 

 


Speaker:

to do that. And, you know, I don't bench press as

 

 


Speaker:

much as Taryn, but, like, I'm from Boston. I have older brothers. We

 

 


Speaker:

were raised. I wouldn't mess with me, you know what I mean? And

 

 


Speaker:

so I always was like, I go to these

 

 


Speaker:

things. I'd go to the strip clubs with all the men, do. Do all the

 

 


Speaker:

parts I was supposed to play. But I was also like, don't

 

 


Speaker:

fuck with me. You know what I mean? And so that's kind of what we're

 

 


Speaker:

trying to teach now is that be careful of the situations you put

 

 


Speaker:

yourself in. Nothing good happens after midnight.

 

 


Speaker:

There's things that we kind of. We have this book that we. It's like the

 

 


Speaker:

secret book that us women have that we're sharing with, you know, some of these

 

 


Speaker:

new younger women coming into the industry. And there's things to

 

 


Speaker:

do, smart things to do and things not to do, you

 

 


Speaker:

know? And also recently, like, I've been

 

 


Speaker:

in a position where I was asked to

 

 


Speaker:

sponsor an event that was associated

 

 


Speaker:

with, or it wasn't associated with, but it was around

 

 


Speaker:

Affiliate World in Bangkok. Right.

 

 


Speaker:

And this event that this company wanted

 

 


Speaker:

me to sponsor was known for

 

 


Speaker:

having paid girls there. And

 

 


Speaker:

I'm just like, I cannot sponsor this event.

 

 


Speaker:

I absolutely will not. I cannot. I'm like,

 

 


Speaker:

I'll probably end up going to the event because it's still

 

 


Speaker:

networking and that's where all the guys that I want to talk to are going

 

 


Speaker:

to go. So I'm still going to go, but I couldn't

 

 


Speaker:

sponsor it. I couldn't request anybody on my

 

 


Speaker:

team, male or female, to go to this event because

 

 


Speaker:

I'm going to risk being sued. Yeah. If I don't, I

 

 


Speaker:

can't be. It's, oh, she made me go to this networking

 

 


Speaker:

event with strippers and hookers. And it's, no, I can't.

 

 


Speaker:

In good conscious, I couldn't do it just because

 

 


Speaker:

that's not what I want for this industry. As a woman, I'm like,

 

 


Speaker:

I thought we were past the strip club networking

 

 


Speaker:

events. Nope, they're still happening. Yeah,

 

 


Speaker:

people still want to have the entertainment, but again, I just

 

 


Speaker:

think that there are far better ways in which you can make that

 

 


Speaker:

happen. I remember going to Miami and basically putting a card

 

 


Speaker:

behind the bar to take a couple of affiliates to send them up to the

 

 


Speaker:

VIP room. And I'm like, what do I need to do to get a drink

 

 


Speaker:

around here? And the guy goes, give me 50 bucks. I'll go next door and

 

 


Speaker:

get a bottle of vodka. Right. So he and bought a vodka. And I sat

 

 


Speaker:

there. Yeah. Just minding my own business. I had no interest at

 

 


Speaker:

all in being there other than to make sure that, you know, the

 

 


Speaker:

affiliates that I was trying to court were satisfied

 

 


Speaker:

to this point that they would do business with me. And again, I look back

 

 


Speaker:

now and think, that was really quite seedy. But I look at it and go,

 

 


Speaker:

it was $1,000 of expenditure to get about half a million

 

 


Speaker:

dollars in revenue. I'm like, that's a fair return. Right. I think have

 

 


Speaker:

your own boundaries as to what you're prepared to do, what you're not prepared to

 

 


Speaker:

do. So, yeah, and I was going to. I was going to add, I

 

 


Speaker:

remember, you know, I know living out here in St. Augustine, Florida, is not as

 

 


Speaker:

exciting anymore, and I don't see as many clients.

 

 


Speaker:

But, you know, back in San Francisco, those would come into town, you know, there's

 

 


Speaker:

plenty to do. And I remember would take our clients or some

 

 


Speaker:

of our publishers to, like, the Gold Club. Everybody has probably been to the

 

 


Speaker:

Gold Club in San Francisco. And so, you know, things just start

 

 


Speaker:

to get uncomfortable, especially as a woman. Like, all of a sudden, the owner.

 

 


Speaker:

The owner of one of the. Well, I should say the owner of the. One

 

 


Speaker:

of my clients was, then offered me $10,000 to

 

 


Speaker:

give him a lap dance and do all this other stuff. And I looked at

 

 


Speaker:

him and I'm like, nah, bro. Like, I'm not going to do that. Okay. Like,

 

 


Speaker:

let's do business and whatever. He's like, damn, I can't believe you wouldn't

 

 


Speaker:

just take my money. And I'm like, no, I, you know,

 

 


Speaker:

I'm running a business here, and I, you know, I have other people working for

 

 


Speaker:

me here. And so that's going to be the example that I show them. Come

 

 


Speaker:

on now. And then, other times, like, you know, we'd bring

 

 


Speaker:

other publishers there, and then you'd be sitting there, and

 

 


Speaker:

then the strippers come up, the coked up strippers, right? And all they want to

 

 


Speaker:

do is talk to you and be your best friend. Now, for a woman, this

 

 


Speaker:

gets very, very annoying after a certain time. And then

 

 


Speaker:

she. They start saying completely inappropriate things like, oh, you

 

 


Speaker:

have sexual tension with your client and you guys should get together. And I'm

 

 


Speaker:

like, okay, all right. You know, after

 

 


Speaker:

the fifth or sixth time of this kind of behavior, you're just like,

 

 


Speaker:

okay, why am I subjecting myself to this? There's. I still, you know, add

 

 


Speaker:

value to this relationship if, even if I'm not at this strip club, hey, I'd

 

 


Speaker:

rather give you a great meal. Maybe I'm boring now. I'd

 

 


Speaker:

rather give you a great bottle of wine, a great meal, and, you know, talk

 

 


Speaker:

about things that really matter in our lives as opposed to, oh, hey, now

 

 


Speaker:

you've seen naked chicks, Give me some more money. You know, it's just after a

 

 


Speaker:

while, it just gets so fucking annoying.

 

 


Speaker:

But I feel like we stepped out, you know, Karen, Like, I remember clients would

 

 


Speaker:

be like, sarah, we're not going to sign a contract with you unless you come

 

 


Speaker:

up to the hotel. Like, come up to my hotel room. Just, you know, in

 

 


Speaker:

Vegas especially, just come up to my hotel room. You know, I'm in. I'm in

 

 


Speaker:

the suite, you know, in the Bellagio. Like I give a shit that you're in

 

 


Speaker:

the suite and Bellagio. But that's what they would do, sign a contract, come up

 

 


Speaker:

to that. And then when we just kept saying, no, I'm not going to do

 

 


Speaker:

that, I'll sign the contract right here in the Lobby. Then you kind of have

 

 


Speaker:

this. Then they're like, okay, we don't have to mess with

 

 


Speaker:

her anymore. Right? You know what I mean? This is. She set the ground rules,

 

 


Speaker:

so hopefully we can teach that to everybody, you

 

 


Speaker:

know, that they don't have to put themselves in. In that position that

 

 


Speaker:

we owned in. You know, you don't want to go up to the room and

 

 


Speaker:

see the balcony with the hot tub and watch the sunrise.

 

 


Speaker:

It's like, yeah, I know this podcast is, like, you

 

 


Speaker:

know, But I will. Not say that I am,

 

 


Speaker:

like, absolutely perfect. You know, I definitely have seen

 

 


Speaker:

sunrises in Vegas. I've watched many

 

 


Speaker:

clients do illegal substances.

 

 


Speaker:

For sure. I don't need to tell anybody about it. You know, that's their business.

 

 


Speaker:

I. You know, it's been. I've whooped it up in the club. Like, you

 

 


Speaker:

know, even in my 40s,

 

 


Speaker:

but. Amen. Yeah, right? We can still be

 

 


Speaker:

fun. But, you know, it's like you said, it's honoring all those boundaries and. And

 

 


Speaker:

whatnot. So I think that. I mean, I think

 

 


Speaker:

one of the funnest times I had was with Jimmy. Like, we ended up. He

 

 


Speaker:

made me go to New York Bills, Buffalo

 

 


Speaker:

Bills bar in Vegas to watch games. Like,

 

 


Speaker:

and I walk in, and I'm definitely not a Bills fan,

 

 


Speaker:

but, hey, we had a good old time where these people were, like, yelling and

 

 


Speaker:

whooping it up and we were drinking bad beer and we had to order pizza

 

 


Speaker:

from next door and, you know, equally as.

 

 


Speaker:

So true. How did we lose? Did we lose Jim? Did we

 

 


Speaker:

lose our host? I don't know what

 

 


Speaker:

happened. Maybe this is part of it. It's supposed to be

 

 


Speaker:

impromptu, and now we have to figure it out. We figure it out.

 

 


Speaker:

I mean, let's be real, ladies. I. I mean, I remember some fun whooping up

 

 


Speaker:

times at Link Unite events as well. There is a picture with me in a

 

 


Speaker:

statue, and I was like, whoa, that one should not get out.

 

 


Speaker:

I went my first Link Unite event. I was like, okay. Like, I

 

 


Speaker:

just come off of some other trade show events.

 

 


Speaker:

I was like, okay, this will give me a break from drinking, right? We're gonna

 

 


Speaker:

be around other women, not gonna drink as much. It'll be great.

 

 


Speaker:

I think I drank more there than I did at all the events

 

 


Speaker:

combined for the last two months.

 

 


Speaker:

The puss. And, you know, it's safe, fun. You know what I

 

 


Speaker:

mean? That's what I love about it. It's like, we can. We can be together.

 

 


Speaker:

We can. We can do business out by the pool or wherever we are.

 

 


Speaker:

Whatever venue we choose. And, and it, it's, it's

 

 


Speaker:

comfortable. It's comfortable. Nobody has to wear heels.

 

 


Speaker:

200 women pass. Right,

 

 


Speaker:

Right. Like, what's going on? Yeah,

 

 


Speaker:

certainly. Although I know sometimes it gets a little dangerous when we're

 

 


Speaker:

hiking in Arizona. I, I, I gotta hand it to the

 

 


Speaker:

ladies who made it to the top of the mountain because that was.

 

 


Speaker:

Oh, my gosh, I've never hiked in my life.

 

 


Speaker:

Well, you know what's funny about that, Karen, is we, Amanda and I came

 

 


Speaker:

in a couple days early in order to get everything planned, and

 

 


Speaker:

we hiked it. And I remember saying, like, this is not

 

 


Speaker:

for every, like, this is not an easy hike. Like, this is not

 

 


Speaker:

like the hikes that some of these women go on. Like, I hope they're

 

 


Speaker:

prepared. And I remember being worried about water and stuff like that. And

 

 


Speaker:

so. Oh, it's true. Definitely. Some, some women definitely turned

 

 


Speaker:

around on that particular height. The red rocks. Yeah.

 

 


Speaker:

That was. Where

 

 


Speaker:

you had to, like, hold on to scale that one rock, pull yourselves,

 

 


Speaker:

like. Nope. Or the

 

 


Speaker:

helicopter that was flying around, you know, saving people that

 

 


Speaker:

couldn't. Yeah. Oh, my gosh,

 

 


Speaker:

that was so crazy dangerous.

 

 


Speaker:

Yeah. No, you're missing. Right. And I'm all

 

 


Speaker:

for pushing. Right. Push yourself to do things that you don't

 

 


Speaker:

normally do, but yeah, a lot of you comfortable.

 

 


Speaker:

Yeah. And I know I built some bonds

 

 


Speaker:

with folks. Oh, is Jim there? Is it moving?

 

 


Speaker:

He's just not on video. I saw some movement, but it builds

 

 


Speaker:

bonds, I think, you know, when you try to do stuff out of your comfort

 

 


Speaker:

zone, you know, in a safe environment, it

 

 


Speaker:

builds trust as well. And that's how you connect. That's what the

 

 


Speaker:

connection is. Yeah.

 

 


Speaker:

Experiences especially that get you out of your comfort zone.

 

 


Speaker:

I think right now, the coolest thing for me right now about Link Unite is

 

 


Speaker:

the fact that the three of us probably know this better than anybody

 

 


Speaker:

in this industry is walking into a happy hour and actually

 

 


Speaker:

knowing other females there. You know what I mean? Like, I remember going into

 

 


Speaker:

happy hours by myself. You know,

 

 


Speaker:

no women to be found at all. You know what I mean? And

 

 


Speaker:

so I think that's the best part. And we're, we're

 

 


Speaker:

searching out venues right now for linky night five for

 

 


Speaker:

2025. So we're looking forward to getting that planned

 

 


Speaker:

and sorted. Jimmy's back. Can you hear me?

 

 


Speaker:

Yeah, we can hear you. I tell you what I did. I kicked the cable

 

 


Speaker:

out of my, like, at the back of the computer. Like, bang. It all went

 

 


Speaker:

black. But obviously you guys were still on here. Well, that's good. Apologies for

 

 


Speaker:

that. That's the problems. Yeah, no worries. We thought this was part of the show.

 

 


Speaker:

Yeah, I was testing our podcast abilities.

 

 


Speaker:

Yeah, it's like we. We have this program called Big Brother. I don't know if

 

 


Speaker:

you have it over in the States, but basically they just get a bunch of

 

 


Speaker:

extroverted people into a house, they throw in a bunch of booze, and

 

 


Speaker:

then just walk away and leave them to it. So maybe I've done the same

 

 


Speaker:

thing with you ladies. Just left you in the room. Unfortunately, I didn't leave you

 

 


Speaker:

with cocktails, but I've left you in the room, left you your own devices. But,

 

 


Speaker:

yeah, I was able to hear what you were saying. Again, I love the fact

 

 


Speaker:

that you just pick things up and just kept going with. Without me

 

 


Speaker:

even being here. Maybe I should do that. Maybe I'll just have. I won't even

 

 


Speaker:

need to be on the show. I can just have you guys do the whole

 

 


Speaker:

thing for me. We thought

 

 


Speaker:

you were watching us, Jim. We thought maybe. Okay, let's see how

 

 


Speaker:

well these women can handle this without a man. Listen, I know you're well

 

 


Speaker:

enough to know that you would absolutely have no

 

 


Speaker:

issue at all whatsoever with

 

 


Speaker:

handling whatever gets thrown at you. So I guess

 

 


Speaker:

I have one burning question. So I mentioned I've got grandkids, so one of

 

 


Speaker:

my grandchildren is. She's seven, nearly eight.

 

 


Speaker:

So she. In probably maybe 10 or 11 years time,

 

 


Speaker:

she's going to be starting to think about leaving school, going to find

 

 


Speaker:

a job. What would you say? I mean, hopefully this

 

 


Speaker:

episode will be there for posterity forever. Right. So.

 

 


Speaker:

Well, I'm trying to kind of plant the seeds now to kind of

 

 


Speaker:

help pave the way for people like

 

 


Speaker:

my granddaughter to have a future. Because I love this industry. I mean,

 

 


Speaker:

I think it's been phenomenal for me. I've made so many great friends.

 

 


Speaker:

Right. I look at the kind of, the business side of it as a kind

 

 


Speaker:

of byproduct of the friendships that I've made. I mean, I've made some amazing friends,

 

 


Speaker:

including you three. And, you know, and I hope to kind

 

 


Speaker:

of continue to kind of evolve that relationship. But

 

 


Speaker:

what would you recommend for young people now who may

 

 


Speaker:

listen to this episode, whether it's, like, now or sometime in the future?

 

 


Speaker:

What would you recommend that they do to sort of set themselves up to get

 

 


Speaker:

on and do well in this industry?

 

 


Speaker:

I think it would be about finding an angle that they can

 

 


Speaker:

be passionate about. I think that I have two teenage

 

 


Speaker:

kids. They're 14 and 15amazing

 

 


Speaker:

kids. And as I know, Sarah and Taryn have amazing

 

 


Speaker:

kids as well. All of us have teenagers, and they're all in

 

 


Speaker:

that stage where they're, what am I going to do for the rest of my

 

 


Speaker:

life? So I think we're all starting to have those conversations with our

 

 


Speaker:

kids now. I think as far as kids, like, we.

 

 


Speaker:

You brought them to London. Yeah, yeah. We got to sing Happy Birthday. Yes, I

 

 


Speaker:

did. Yeah. I think that it's important that our kids

 

 


Speaker:

look at. I love this industry, too. It's why I've stayed in

 

 


Speaker:

it for 20 years. There are aspects of it that I don't

 

 


Speaker:

particularly like, but as a whole, I can't

 

 


Speaker:

imagine not working in payments.

 

 


Speaker:

Right. For my kids, I want

 

 


Speaker:

to best encourage them to find what inspires

 

 


Speaker:

them, what motivates them, what moves them.

 

 


Speaker:

And had my kids, they took an entrepreneur class when they

 

 


Speaker:

were like 8 years old. It was a kidpreneur

 

 


Speaker:

class. And it was like, okay, three things that you

 

 


Speaker:

love. And then the next step was to

 

 


Speaker:

come up with three problems for each of those three things that you

 

 


Speaker:

love, and now come up with a solution for each of those problems.

 

 


Speaker:

And that's your entrepreneur idea, because you're going to

 

 


Speaker:

solve that problem. It's not just you that has that

 

 


Speaker:

problem. It's going to be something you love. So you're going to be motivated

 

 


Speaker:

to get up every day and work for it and make it

 

 


Speaker:

work and scalable and how you can

 

 


Speaker:

best service a problem that and fix

 

 


Speaker:

that problem that exists. I think that's more

 

 


Speaker:

important than pushing my kids to follow in my

 

 


Speaker:

steps and work in payments. You know, like, my son

 

 


Speaker:

came up with an amazing idea for lego. I don't know how to make it

 

 


Speaker:

come to fruition, but he wanted a Lego 3D printer, because

 

 


Speaker:

if you lose a piece to a set, the entire set's useless.

 

 


Speaker:

Right. So if you had a LEGO license,

 

 


Speaker:

LEGO licensed plastic material, and you could just paid

 

 


Speaker:

$2 and have the LEGO printed right there in your home

 

 


Speaker:

without calling up lego, having them send you a piece, whatever.

 

 


Speaker:

Build a custom set, whatever. It's a brilliant idea.

 

 


Speaker:

Right? Because he loves legos, but he hates that if he loses a piece, he

 

 


Speaker:

can't build it anymore. Yeah, let's find something you love, find a

 

 


Speaker:

problem, come up with a solution.

 

 


Speaker:

They're the only people that have that problem. But most people experience, or a lot

 

 


Speaker:

of people experience the same problem. Yeah.

 

 


Speaker:

Yeah. You're not the only one with the problem.

 

 


Speaker:

So true. That's great.

 

 


Speaker:

Sarah. Did you want to go next or no? I was just going to say

 

 


Speaker:

talk to anybody. That's my advice that I tell my kids.

 

 


Speaker:

Now, you know, Molly's, she's on college hunt right

 

 


Speaker:

now. She's a senior in high school and my son's right behind her is a

 

 


Speaker:

junior. And I say talk to anybody because you're going to go into a room

 

 


Speaker:

and you know, you're kind of taught like who you should talk to and who

 

 


Speaker:

you shouldn't talk to kind of thing. But I'm throw that

 

 


Speaker:

out the window. Talk to everybody. I think I've made

 

 


Speaker:

some crazy connections over these years in this industry by just

 

 


Speaker:

walking up to these random people and having a conversation and getting to know

 

 


Speaker:

them. Especially in the urban industry, you know, just people working

 

 


Speaker:

at the venues that we've had events at. I mean they, they

 

 


Speaker:

shoot me texts to ask about my life and my kids. And you know, I

 

 


Speaker:

see them once a year, maybe once every years. You know what I mean?

 

 


Speaker:

It's. Talk to anybody because you know what, we're all in this together. The way

 

 


Speaker:

I look at it, you know, and you might network and meet somebody

 

 


Speaker:

randomly that, you know, down the road they're going to be able to give you

 

 


Speaker:

some sort of an intro that, that's crucial, you know, so

 

 


Speaker:

be open to anybody. Yeah,

 

 


Speaker:

I do agree with that. I love that. I mean, and it's kind of, it's

 

 


Speaker:

funny because maybe it's like my place to say like what I'm

 

 


Speaker:

thinking now too. My, my boys are a little bit younger, so they're 11 and

 

 


Speaker:

13. But you know what you're saying, finding things that you're

 

 


Speaker:

passionate about. If anybody watches me on social media, they know my older son

 

 


Speaker:

loves heavy metal and rock and plays guitar and he's die hard into

 

 


Speaker:

all of that. Um, J, my younger one is, he's into baseball.

 

 


Speaker:

He's playing on two teams right now. And he's, you know, he's not the best,

 

 


Speaker:

he's not the worst. But you know what, he's super passionate and, and

 

 


Speaker:

improves every single day. And then, you

 

 


Speaker:

know, it's like, hey, you're trying to, if you can talk to this

 

 


Speaker:

person and this coach, you will learn this from that guy. And

 

 


Speaker:

then you talk to the other coach, you're learning other basic skills too. Just like

 

 


Speaker:

with Kai, he has two different guitar teachers as well. One at school and then

 

 


Speaker:

one that we personally pay for. Um, but

 

 


Speaker:

utilizing all of those, but then also your follow through

 

 


Speaker:

and just making sure that you do the

 

 


Speaker:

work now Whether it's practicing, you know, things you're passionate

 

 


Speaker:

about or just turning thing in, turning things into a client.

 

 


Speaker:

That's the difference between closing the deal is actually doing the work versus,

 

 


Speaker:

oh, saying the yada yadas, you know, so it's, you know,

 

 


Speaker:

being consistent with actually being

 

 


Speaker:

passionate, utilizing your resources and then doing the work on top

 

 


Speaker:

of which. And I said, so I think that if you can find all three,

 

 


Speaker:

you're going to be very successful regardless if it's this industry or

 

 


Speaker:

whatever industry you go into. That's what, that would be my advice.

 

 


Speaker:

I went to school and I did. I had a really good

 

 


Speaker:

education paid for me, but I just decided that I was far more

 

 


Speaker:

interested in sports, in women, smoking,

 

 


Speaker:

drinking, all those sorts of really bad things for you.

 

 


Speaker:

And consequently I left school with virtually no

 

 


Speaker:

educational qualifications. So my education has really been an

 

 


Speaker:

education of life. Right. And it's always difficult. I mean, you know, when you, when

 

 


Speaker:

you've had success in business that, you know,

 

 


Speaker:

came in spite of your education, not because of it. Right.

 

 


Speaker:

It's very difficult because like my, my, I've got two older grandchildren

 

 


Speaker:

who went to private school and they were like, why do I need to go

 

 


Speaker:

to private school, Granddad? You do. Well, blah, blah, blah. And I'm like, don't,

 

 


Speaker:

don't kind of use me as the, kind of the template for what success

 

 


Speaker:

looks like, right? So it's not always going to be the same way. Some,

 

 


Speaker:

sometimes it will and that's fine, but sometimes it's really not, right.

 

 


Speaker:

I think sometimes it is. Against again, I've always maintained you've got

 

 


Speaker:

to be trustworthy, reliable, work incredibly hard.

 

 


Speaker:

I mean I've worked so hard since I started working and I really wish

 

 


Speaker:

if I could have applied myself at school the same way I did at work,

 

 


Speaker:

I'd probably been the smartest person in the world. But know, I just didn't,

 

 


Speaker:

could had no interest. And I think it's, I, I go back, I go to

 

 


Speaker:

school reunions and I, I see, I remember turning up to a school reunion In

 

 


Speaker:

I think 2002 or three or something like that and one of my teachers,

 

 


Speaker:

I, I turned up in a, an Audi convertible and, and one of my teachers

 

 


Speaker:

was looking and, and I, I always make a point, the first,

 

 


Speaker:

first time I, whenever I see teachers now, I always make a point of

 

 


Speaker:

apologizing for being such a dick at school, right? Because I really

 

 


Speaker:

was, I was complete and utter ass at school. Right.

 

 


Speaker:

My teachers hated me, I'm sure at the time, but

 

 


Speaker:

they've said it's. Honestly, it's fine. You, you kind of,

 

 


Speaker:

you've turned out okay. And that's all we look for

 

 


Speaker:

when it comes to it. Right. So I think,

 

 


Speaker:

you know, that's the only thing that kind of matters. So obviously, like

 

 


Speaker:

with, with Link Unite, it's a executive

 

 


Speaker:

leadership.

 

 


Speaker:

I want to call it. I can't. It's a bit like I always call

 

 


Speaker:

X Twitter and I'll always call Meta Facebook. Right. So it's like I'll

 

 


Speaker:

always call Link Unite, an initiative, so a community

 

 


Speaker:

of executive females. Right. So

 

 


Speaker:

if people, if people were kind of interested in getting involved

 

 


Speaker:

in it, what's the kind of, the best way for them to do that?

 

 


Speaker:

Give me it. Give me a call. Just call me. Reach out. I'm the most

 

 


Speaker:

accessible person in this industry. I feel like. Well, we all are. You know,

 

 


Speaker:

Skype, email, text, WhatsApp, whatever you want to use,

 

 


Speaker:

you know, that's what we do. We spend a lot of our time just having

 

 


Speaker:

phone calls with people, you know, and we're, we're helping the mentorship

 

 


Speaker:

husband are crucial with entry level people coming in,

 

 


Speaker:

producing issue or middle of the road, you know, replacing them with some

 

 


Speaker:

fabulous mentors in this industry and so that they can learn.

 

 


Speaker:

But yeah, definitely reach out to either Amanda or myself. We

 

 


Speaker:

will get on the phone with you and figure out what you

 

 


Speaker:

want to do and help you in any way we can. And bearing in mind

 

 


Speaker:

that there are probably hundreds of thousands of

 

 


Speaker:

men like me who are bumbling their way around trying to

 

 


Speaker:

see how they can support the women in the industry, what would

 

 


Speaker:

you say the best way men in the industry can support

 

 


Speaker:

the women in the industry? So right now

 

 


Speaker:

I think an awesome initiative is the corporate

 

 


Speaker:

membership package that we're offering. It's, you know, pretty well low

 

 


Speaker:

cost and it's, it's six individual memberships. And so what

 

 


Speaker:

companies are doing that don't have that many women working for

 

 


Speaker:

them, they're gifting them out. So we have a lot of male partners that are

 

 


Speaker:

joining up as our corporate members and then kind of giving out memberships

 

 


Speaker:

to their clients. I have a call tomorrow with a new woman that's just joining

 

 


Speaker:

and she was gifted a membership. She knew nothing about Link Unite, and

 

 


Speaker:

she's so excited to meet everybody and, you know, join the

 

 


Speaker:

tribe. So I would say that's definitely the best thing. You

 

 


Speaker:

know, support a woman, let her get in for the membership and reap the

 

 


Speaker:

benefits. Yeah, probably because I'm like an old fart.

 

 


Speaker:

But again, I was Brought up in a certain way to be very

 

 


Speaker:

chivalrous. And again, if we were in. If we were living in the times of.

 

 


Speaker:

Putting down your cape in front of a puddle to allow a woman to step

 

 


Speaker:

over it, that would be me, right? I'm that kind of guy. But I think

 

 


Speaker:

a lot of women don't like that. Right. I don't need you to put your

 

 


Speaker:

jacket down for me. I can quite happily walk through the puddle on my own.

 

 


Speaker:

Right. So again, how do you suggest men navigate

 

 


Speaker:

that? Well, I'm going to

 

 


Speaker:

say. Yeah, I was like, let Taryn talk on this.

 

 


Speaker:

Oh, that's okay. I was just gonna say, you know what? I

 

 


Speaker:

still am a person who believes that manners go

 

 


Speaker:

a long way. You know, as somebody who's highly

 

 


Speaker:

independent, you know, I come from a big city

 

 


Speaker:

and all that and can handle my way. But gosh darn

 

 


Speaker:

it, raising my boys to have manners

 

 


Speaker:

goes so far. You know, they're. I have people constantly

 

 


Speaker:

coming back to us and say, wow, you know what? They're, they say they're please

 

 


Speaker:

and thank yous. They're. They're pleasure to be around. I mean, they're, they're. I mean,

 

 


Speaker:

yeah, they're rowdy too, but you know what? They know they're the place to

 

 


Speaker:

do it. So what I was going to say is that, look, we are, you

 

 


Speaker:

know, many of us are individuals who are very independent and very intelligent in our

 

 


Speaker:

industry. The women are, the majority of which I've met are, you know,

 

 


Speaker:

highly intelligent. But allowing them, Allowing them to

 

 


Speaker:

speak and using your manners and doing. So stop speaking over people

 

 


Speaker:

constantly, you know, and trying to re. Explain what they're doing.

 

 


Speaker:

You know, just allow the woman to speak and say her piece. If you have

 

 


Speaker:

a question, just ask them the question just like you would a man. You know,

 

 


Speaker:

I want to confirm what you're saying here. Da, da, da, da. You know, please,

 

 


Speaker:

I'm. I mean, that's why I love hanging out with you, Jimmy Banks. You know,

 

 


Speaker:

Banksy, you do have the manners. You do introduce us to

 

 


Speaker:

everybody who's around. We. I absolutely adore being around you

 

 


Speaker:

because you, you know, you have that chivalrous way about you. And

 

 


Speaker:

I, I don't want that to change, man. And I love it when the other

 

 


Speaker:

men do the same thing.

 

 


Speaker:

I'm not doing it because for any other reason than I just

 

 


Speaker:

love the people I work in this industry with. Right? Just. Yeah, just

 

 


Speaker:

hands down, great people.

 

 


Speaker:

I think I would respect and show up, you know, show up and

 

 


Speaker:

support each other, you know, all three of you showed up to elevate a

 

 


Speaker:

brand new event that Leonard and Johnstone, you know, was doing. I mean,

 

 


Speaker:

that's so crucial, right? We were all there to support that new

 

 


Speaker:

event and showing up and having respect for each

 

 


Speaker:

other, whether you're a man, woman, whatever, you know what I mean? Just

 

 


Speaker:

have respect. We're all. Life is not easy, you

 

 


Speaker:

know, so, like, let's just be respectful for each other.

 

 


Speaker:

It's as simple as that. Yeah. And I think, I think

 

 


Speaker:

I know that you posted something on LinkedIn about her,

 

 


Speaker:

but like, we lost one of our industry colleagues,

 

 


Speaker:

Deborah Carney, who used to run the affiliate network

 

 


Speaker:

Loxley, you know, again, she was like a larger than life character

 

 


Speaker:

and will be sorely missed by the industry. But to me, it just like

 

 


Speaker:

highlights how important it is to live your life and do the best you can.

 

 


Speaker:

Because we're not around forever, right? We're all going to, at some point in time,

 

 


Speaker:

tap out and head off. You want to try and make sure that you leave

 

 


Speaker:

the world in a better place as a result of you being here than going,

 

 


Speaker:

do you remember that douchebag that we all hated? He's gone now and we're

 

 


Speaker:

apt to see the back of him. Right. You just don't want to be that

 

 


Speaker:

person. Right. And we all know in this industry there are people like that,

 

 


Speaker:

that people don't like the way they do business, they don't pay their bills and

 

 


Speaker:

all that sort of stuff. And that reputation will follow you around. Right. And

 

 


Speaker:

I don't think, again, that's not a gender thing. It's not a, you know,

 

 


Speaker:

just, it's just some people are just naturally not nice people.

 

 


Speaker:

Yeah. And I would also like to add, you know, to

 

 


Speaker:

be supportive and to, to talk some of your favorite

 

 


Speaker:

females up. You know, a lot of the times I still go to events and

 

 


Speaker:

I, I'm very quiet. Like, I know what I do. I know I can talk

 

 


Speaker:

to a wall if I need to, but I, you know, I just kind of

 

 


Speaker:

let my reputation precede me now because I've been doing

 

 


Speaker:

this a long time. But, you know, you still get

 

 


Speaker:

young bucks, if you will, in the industry. Like, oh, what do you do? What

 

 


Speaker:

do you know about this industry? And I love. And I'll use the

 

 


Speaker:

optismo guys as an example. Like, they're like, oh,

 

 


Speaker:

don't start with Taryn. Just,

 

 


Speaker:

they're like, you're barking up the wrong tree. You know, they're like, she's been doing

 

 


Speaker:

this a long time. And as soon as Like, I get this other

 

 


Speaker:

like, street cred from my male colleagues in the industry. You know, all of a

 

 


Speaker:

sudden, you know, the tone, the ego gets dropped and

 

 


Speaker:

then just business ensues. Yeah. I think what really kind of

 

 


Speaker:

highlighted. We opened an office in Hong Kong and one of the things

 

 


Speaker:

that I obviously flew over there, I took my stepdaughter with me, I took

 

 


Speaker:

my wife with me. And when you kind of go. Go into a meeting,

 

 


Speaker:

right. I mean, she was, she was like, she was like leading. She was the

 

 


Speaker:

point person in every meeting that we had. Right. So I was just kind of

 

 


Speaker:

there just in the background and. But you know, you

 

 


Speaker:

walk into a room and like, they automatically kind of gravitate to talk

 

 


Speaker:

to me and I'm like, no, I'm not leading this. You should talk to her.

 

 


Speaker:

Right. She's the one that's kind of in charge here. I'm not the one in

 

 


Speaker:

charge. And it's, it's so difficult when that's typically

 

 


Speaker:

the sort of the stereotype for that type of scenario.

 

 


Speaker:

Right. And I know it's

 

 


Speaker:

changing, but it's still think we've got such a long, long way to go. Right.

 

 


Speaker:

So for me, like to be able to have ladies like you on

 

 


Speaker:

to kind of talk to me today, educate me, hopefully educate my

 

 


Speaker:

audience about the community that you have with Link

 

 


Speaker:

Unite and obviously your participation in it

 

 


Speaker:

and getting some really good sort of life advice

 

 


Speaker:

for people that are either in the industry already looking to kind

 

 


Speaker:

of get onto the next level up or looking to kind of break into the

 

 


Speaker:

industry for the first time. Because that's my mission is, is to kind of try

 

 


Speaker:

and help educate and develop the next generation of,

 

 


Speaker:

in my case, media buyers. But you know, but it could be affiliate marketers or

 

 


Speaker:

whatever, people that work in digital marketing in one way, shape or form.

 

 


Speaker:

Right. That's what I kind of like live and breathe is just I'm there to

 

 


Speaker:

try and support the industry in whatever way I can because the better the industry

 

 


Speaker:

does, the better the world does, I think as a result of

 

 


Speaker:

it. You know, I think when you look at the amount of money that's being

 

 


Speaker:

spent online now in whatever way, obviously Cali, you

 

 


Speaker:

pay me process all the money, which is such an integral part of the

 

 


Speaker:

whole process. And yeah, I just think there's so much that kind of like

 

 


Speaker:

bonds it all together that I just think it's important that we collectively

 

 


Speaker:

work as a team to get the best results that we can.

 

 


Speaker:

Absolutely Love that. Yeah, indeed.

 

 


Speaker:

I was just going to add to that Jimmy, you know, like the. Let people

 

 


Speaker:

do what they do best, you know, and you don't have to be the smartest.

 

 


Speaker:

Everything I, I tell my kids that I go, I always ask somebody

 

 


Speaker:

smarter than me at this or this and this. I know what I know. But

 

 


Speaker:

if I don't know, don't be afraid to ask. And if somebody tries to make

 

 


Speaker:

you feel less than because you are asking, that's on

 

 


Speaker:

them. That's, you know, maybe that's not the right person you should be working with

 

 


Speaker:

or playing with or hanging out with, you know?

 

 


Speaker:

Yeah. You got to train people as the best.

 

 


Speaker:

You can give them the kind of the boundaries of parameters in which

 

 


Speaker:

they can operate. Right. Where their sort of limitations are. Because there

 

 


Speaker:

has to be some. Right. And then get the out the way and let them

 

 


Speaker:

get home with it. Right. Because if you try and micromanage them, I've seen so

 

 


Speaker:

many people try and micromanage the living daylights out of people. Right. It's not going

 

 


Speaker:

to be good for them and it's not going to be good for your company.

 

 


Speaker:

So. No, not at all. Not at all.

 

 


Speaker:

So, Kaylee, you're probably going to go and get cocktails now in Malta, which

 

 


Speaker:

I'm jealous of. Yes. I have a

 

 


Speaker:

white party, a dinner and party and

 

 


Speaker:

drinks and all that good stuff. We're so jealous. Yeah. You look good,

 

 


Speaker:

girl. I rock it. Hey, looking good.

 

 


Speaker:

But I love it. Honestly, this, this, I was, I was like

 

 


Speaker:

super nervous about putting this together. I'm so glad that we

 

 


Speaker:

persevered. It was actually getting you on was the easy with

 

 


Speaker:

the easiest I've had in terms of trying to get guests to coordinate.

 

 


Speaker:

So thank you for being so accommodating and obviously thank

 

 


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you for taking over the kind of the conversation while I was having my technical

 

 


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issues. It only remains to you guys. It

 

 


Speaker:

only remains to say that all of the ladies details will be available in

 

 


Speaker:

the show notes for the episode. It will be available on

 

 


Speaker:

YouTube, Apple, Spotify, wherever else you consume your

 

 


Speaker:

podcast information. Make sure you tell your friends about bad

 

 


Speaker:

decisions with Jim Banks and I look forward to seeing you on the

 

 


Speaker:

next episode. Katie's got turn. Lights out.

 

 


Speaker:

Thank you. Thanks, nuts. Thank you.

 

 


Speaker:

Yeah, thanks for having us, Banksy. I appreciate it. It's lovely to see you

 

 


Speaker:

ladies too. Happy holiday.

 

 

 

 

 

Jim Banks Profile Photo

Jim Banks

Podcast Host

Jim is the host of Bad Decisions with Jim Banks, the leading digital marketing podcast for aspiring digital marketers.

Kali Ashford Profile Photo

Kali Ashford

Founder/CEO

I have worked in payments for more than 20 years, starting in credit card processing, then switching to card issuing, managing the media spend for clients and building the software that helps them to manage their campaigns and profitability. Collectively, my clients spend up to 1MM/day on media, globally.

Taryn Stoddard Profile Photo

Taryn Stoddard

Owner

With 25 years as a digital marketer, I am an affiliate marketing expert who helps clients generate leads, conversions, and revenue across various verticals and channels. As the owner of The Kaija Group, we demonstrate guidance and practices for clients. And as a mom, watch out world because I'm helping to raise the next generation!

Side note in 2020, I was honored to receive the AFFY Award, a recognition of excellence in digital affiliate marketing, nominated by my peers. I am passionate about business, entrepreneurship, and innovation, and I always strive to exceed expectations and achieve goals for my clients as well as my team.

Sara Malo Profile Photo

Sara Malo

Co-Founder LinkUnite / VP of Partnerships LGW

Sara Malo is the President/COO of LinkUnite, a community of executive women in digital marketing and the VP of Partnerships at Lead Generation World. Sara is a veteran marketer with 22 years experience in digital marketing and the marketing events industry She started LinkUnite in 2018 with Amanda Farris after realizing that there was a need for support and representation for executive women in the male-dominated digital marketing industry.

“We want to see more brilliant women delivering content at the industry events.” When it comes to her personal brand, Sara says it has been the “key to her success.” She used to work behind the scenes, but she wanted to be known and give back some goodness. She believes that every post, picture, video, podcast, etc. that she puts out into the world comes from a genuine place, and she takes pride in that.”

Malo is passionate about giving back to the industry and has served as a mentor to many young professionals over the years. She plans to focus on the L.I.N.K. mentorship program and keep the industry growing.

Sara would love to hear from you! Connect with Sara today!
E: sara@linkunite.live
C: 571.383.7584
S: live:sara_14196